I have a question about how girls feel when we meet incall. Like do they reject if I have a fat belly or my dick is small?
So...you're about to walk through the door of your escort's incall, and suddenly you become painfully aware of everything about yourself that 'isn't good enough'.
Too old, too much flab, having a small penis...there are so many ways we can feel insecure about our bodies! No matter where your issues lie, you're left feeling anxious and awkward. You might even wonder 'what if they turn me down?'
Never fear. I have some reassuring advice for you.
Why do we doubt ourselves so much?
Body insecurity - worrying that you don't deserve sex, or that others won't find you sexy, because you don't look right - is a near-universal problem. Believe it or not, it affects workers too.
I often catch myself scrolling through other workers' selfies on Twitter and wondering why my clients pay so much for my company, when everyone else seems so much more attractive. When I meet a new customer, I'm sometimes afraid that they'll turn me away once they realise I'm a regular 40-something and not an airbrushed Sports Illustrated model. Rationally, I know that everyone has wobbly bits, scars and hair in inconvenient places. So why do I hold myself to such a high standard?
I think society often tells us that only a certain kind of person deserves to feel sexy. Magazines, movies and TV all reinforce the idea that sex belongs to the young, slim, and conventionally attractive...and imperfect people don't deserve to get laid.
This means that many of us are afraid to even try...and when we do date, we're often shamed or turned down by partners who are holding themselves (and others) to these unrealistic beauty standards too.
Luckily, I have some good news for you...
With sex workers, the rules are different.
Spending time with a sex worker is a very special kind of social contract: the usual rules simply don't apply. When you pay a pro, you're entering into a different kind of agreement that has very little to do with society's unrealistic standards of beauty or desirability.
A good sex worker sees clients from diverse backgrounds and walks of life. We understand that all bodies are different, and we don't require our customers to fit society's typical dating standards.
Here's an example of the kind of things we don't expect from you:
- We don't need you to be fit, young, or conventionally attractive.
- We don't expect you to be socially confident.
- We don't need you to be be sexually experienced or well-endowed.
- We don't demand that you woo us with impressive stories, a prestigious career or a huge bank account.
Sure, you might be any or all of the above, but it makes no difference to whether we consider you a good client.
A professional won't give you grief about your physical appearance. After all, we see all kinds of people. And no matter the size of your dick - whether it's small, huge or in-between - an experienced worker will know the techniques and sex positions to try that are most likely to work for you.
On the other hand, there are a few things that do matter:
- You need to pay us our agreed rate, at the start of the session.
- You're expected to be well-presented and have good personal hygiene. That means washing your whole body thoroughly with soap (make sure you wash under your belly, if you have one!)
- Above all, we require respect - you must follow our instructions and obey our dos and don'ts.
Failing to do this can result in you being turned away, or having your booking cut short. If you're worried about being refused, cleanliness and respect are the real issues to worry about!
Pleasure is for everyone.
One of the best lessons I've learned in the sex industry is that people who are fat, old, or 'funny looking' can still have amazing sex.
Some of my most outstanding sexual partners have been people you wouldn't look twice at on the street! Being good in bed has very little to do with your shape and size, and everything to do with your attitude and effort.
We all deserve to feel sexy, even if it's just when we're having sex with ourselves. And seeing a professional is a way to get intimate with someone who won't judge you by unrealistic standards. The right sex worker can help you enjoy your body, regardless of what it looks like.
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